Today's Smile

A man was sitting at his table in the restaurant reading the menu. The waiter came over.

Waiter: "Has sir decided?"
Man: " Yes I think I'll have the octopus"
Waiter: "Very good sir, but I'm afraid there will be a two hour wait"
Man: "That's ridiculous. Why does it take that long?"
Waiter: "Well sir, we cook them alive on top of the stove and they keep turning the gas off"

Are There Vikings In Blankney Park?

I have on my bookshelves a book, entitled The Scarlet Tree, an autobiography by Osbert Sitwell, published in 1947. Osbert Sitwell 1892-1969 devoted his life to art and literature. Osbert was born into a privileged society, his mother was a relative of Lord Londesborough who owned Blankney Hall. He grew up in the family seat at Renishaw Hall, Derbyshire, attended Ludgrove and Eton, before joining the army at the outbreak of the first world war, finally leaving the service in 1918 with the rank of Captain. As a schoolboy Osbert used to spend Christmas with his parents at Blankney Hall. He relates a fascinating insight into life at the Hall at the turn of the century. He describes in great detail the interior of the Hall and makes some wonderful observations of the house guests, gathered for the festive season. At some point in the future I will return to these fascinating insights but for now I will turn to a very different part of Osbert's story. Osbert was told by his father that in Blankney Park there were many enormous pits, containing whole armies of Danish invaders. The great slaughter was said to have taken place between A.D. 700-800. The young boy felt his blood tingle as his father described how these huge excavations had been filled with the bodies of warriors killed by the retreating Saxons. His father went on to describe how the Viking bodies were first covered by branches of trees on which the earth had been shovelled - that accounted for the mounds. His father, an intellectual, quickly got bored by the Londesborough lifestyle and scorned their pursuits. The young Osbert recalls his father declaring to him that if only the members of his mother's family were more intelligent, they would spend their whole time in digging up the bones, instead of in hunting, shooting and going to circuses. This story is given further credence by earlier accounts written about 1813 that during the time of the Britons, prior to the Saxon period, two great earthworks one at Scopwick and one at Blankney Heath were constructed. Both were of similar size and said to be eighty yards in diameter and eight feet deep. It states the Blankney excavation had been preserved by planting by Charles Chaplin. Charles Chaplin was a previous encumbent of Blankney Hall. So, are their Vikings buried in Blankney Park? It is a fact that the Vikings did come to this area and it is likely that bloody battles were fought between the locals and the invaders. In which case there would have been casualties and those killed would have been buried. It may be because I want to believe it but I do buy into this story. Perhaps we should leave it to the Time Team to find out!

Looking Back - Sir Anthony Eden

On this day in 1957 Sir Anthony Eden resigned as prime minster of Britain due to ill health. Sir Anthony had previously had a series of gall bladder operations in 1953. Following recurrence of abdominal pains he was advised by his doctors to take complete rest. Sir Anthony was prime minister for one year and 279 days. His decision to use armed intervention in the Suez crisis the previous year was the beginning of his demise as prime minister. Following his resignation he became Earl of Avon in1961. He died in 1967.

Brainteaser

Here is an interesting brainteaser . Take a while to think about it. If you can come up with an answer e-mail it to me garlant@btinternet.com . I will give my answer tomorrow, there could be other alternatives. Here is what you have to do:

Construct a sentence that is good English, makes perfect sense and contains the word 'and' seven consecutive times. It is not easy but it can be done. Good luck.