That's When The Fight Started

My wife and I were at my high school reunion, when she noticed me staring at an obviously drunk woman sitting alone at a table.
"Do you know her?" my wife asked.
"Yes," I sighed. "She's an old girlfriend. She started drinking after we split up years ago, and people say she hasn't been sober since."
"My God!" whispered my wife. "Who would think a person could celebrate that long?"

That's when the fight started ......

Who Am I? - Monday's Answer

The answer to yesterday's

Who Am I? puzzle

was

Joanna Lumley

Invisibles

Today's Smile

To my darling husband.

Before you return from your business trip I just want to let you know about the small accident I had with the pick-up truck when I turned into the driveway.

Fortunately, not too bad and I really didn't get hurt, so please don't worry too much about me.

I was coming home from Wal-Mart, and when I turned into the driveway I accidentally pushed down on to the accelerator instead of the brake.

The garage door is slightly bent but the pick-up luckily came to halt when it bumped into your car.

I am really sorry, but I know with your kind-hearted personality, you will forgive me. You know how much I love you and care for you my sweetheart

I am enclosing a picture for you.

I cannot wait to hold you in my loving arms again.


Your loving wife
XXX
P.S. Your girlfriend called.

Therapy

Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions - switch to espresso.

**********

Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the Prophecy.

**********

As often as possible skip rather than walk.

**********

Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat. Keep a serious face.