Definitions - Computer

Chip
Munchies for TV!

Microchip
The crumbs in the bag after you've eaten the chips.

Modem
What you did to the weeds growing in the lawn.

Dot Matrix
Old Dan matrix's wife.

Lap Top
Where the beer spills when you pass out.

Software
The dumb plastic knives and forks they give you at McDonalds.

Hardware
Real stainless steel cutlery.